As I put my lil one to bed after the usual hoolabooha of nighttime shower, milkfeed, storytime, brushing of teeth and final pee-run, I kissed her goodnight and said "I love you, Kaylen".
She replied with such maturity and absolute sure-rity (is there such a word?) in her still childish, girly voice, "I lurb u too, mummy". With that, she hugged her doggy softtoy and snuggled up in her blanket.
I laid down next to her and felt my heart swelling up and absolutely brimming with happiness. I thought about our trip today to the halfprice bookstore after making the decision to remove all stories about princesses falling in love with princes and awaiting salvation or marriage. She made a new friend and shared a book with her. Suddenly she tapped her friend and pointed at me. "That's MY mummy." She grinned her toothy smile and went back to her book.
This is the first time I am having such a strong feeling of pride for this little one. For sure, I had experienced more moments of realization of the lil one's burgeoning capacity to experience life and connecting with her as a mother and playmate since spending nearly all of my waking hours with her since our move to Dallas. I have never laughed nor danced nor made so much funny faces in my life compared to this period of being a full-time mummy.
Seven months later and the culmination of love and sacrifice has come to this milestone for me as a mother.
Of course who is to say that if I were still working full-time and may not hv spent such time with her but she will most definitely say these words to me?
But for me, I'm happy to have taken this step and even if I were to lament about my lack of opportunities or the "could have", "would have" after I head back to work, I would like to come back to this post and remind myself that nothing in life could have, would have, been as happy as this feeling I felt today.